You are the light of the world. A city set on a hill cannot be hidden. Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

Matthew 5:14-16

God, I am a fool. In the name of not wanting to draw attention to myself, I hide and don’t speak up. I don’t speak up in order to tell the truth about who you are, the truth of your reality, the truth about how you see me and others, and the truth of your words and spirit in any given situation. When I hide myself, I don’t allow you, living in me, to shine. But I’m scared.

I’m scared I’ll take your glory on myself and not point properly to you. I’m scared I’ll get caught up in myself and the great work that I’m doing that I’ll forget about you. I’m scared that I’ll neglect people who are immediately in my life, who are the people whom I need to allow you to shine through me to the most.

Lord, I’m also scared because I don’t want to be made fun of, don’t want to be accused of being “the religious one of the group”, don’t want to do it NOT in the right way or in your right timing – don’t want to mess it up.

And sometimes, Lord, I just don’t want to do it because I don’t want the responsibility. I don’t want people to come to me and need me. I want people to need you and depend on you. But, this foolishness and fear are not right. This is not the right way and this is not what you want me to do. You want me to let your light shine out of me, no matter how giddy and silly I look, or how epic I look, or how religious I look, or how much I look like a failure. You just want me to shine. You just want me to let my light shine. You want me to let YOU, my light, shine out of me.